Undercover: Book 4 — Chapter 25

Keith’s Point of View

I stared at the final body that hit the ground. I wasn’t sure how Jesse was figuring everything out, but the only solution had to be Lisa. The fucking woman’s like a billion years old and a psychopath.

“I don’t know when you changed sides, and I don’t care much if you’re taking care of them, but I need to go find Joey. He’s the one that we got the lead from,” Liam said, already walking towards the door.

“Liam!” Claire yelled, making all eyes snap towards her. “It’s Riley, she’s d–dying.” Her voice cracked, causing Liam to focus on her and then the body laying in front of her.

“You need to keep her alive. Whatever you do you can’t leave her. I’m going to get Joey a–and—” Liam cut off his sentence, trying to control the shakiness of his own voice. “And she’s going to be alive when I come back with him. Keep her alive and keep them safe. You’re a doctor, right? Then find a way to stitch her up.”

I thought back to the small sewing kit I kept in my coat pocket for emergencies and frowned knowing I had used up all of the cheap thread. I decided not to comment on the fact and only nodded.

“Liam, I’m coming with you,” Claire said rushing over. Her dress was almost covered in blood and it was clear she was shaken up as well.

“I don’t have time to look out for you. I need to get to everyone as fast as possible,” Liam said seriously.

“I can’t just sit here and do nothing. I need to see that Caiden’s okay and I have this.”

She pulled out a gun from her back waistband. Liam looked at me with accusing eyes, and I shrugged. I didn’t know where she got that.

“You probably have never shot anyone before,” Liam said, trying to take the weapon from her hand. But she quickly pulled away, keeping it away from him.

“You’re right, but there’s a first for everything. I can be your backup. Now, let’s go, we’re wasting time,” she said heading towards the door, not bothering to look back. He let out a sigh and looked at me carefully.

“Take care of her,” he said before running after Claire. Once they were both out of the room, I went over and locked the door and pushed an old desk in front of it. I shook my head in disgust when I saw a bunch of special tools laying in a case on the table. They were tools the gang would use to torture their victims. My eyes caught sight of an iPhone in a pink case laying on the table. I grabbed it and clicked the home button. I saw a picture of Clover kissing a man on the cheek while two kids sat in front of them making faces at the camera.

“I take it this is yours?” I asked Clover, walking over to her and handing her the iPhone. She quickly took it and wiped off the dirty screen.

“Where’d you find it?” she asked.

I shrugged.

“It was laying on the table. Jesse probably took it off you when you were first brought in here,” I said.

“I’m going to call for some help. Will you hold her?” she asked.

I nodded. I switched spots with her and held on to Riley. The movement caused her to open her brown eyes. She didn’t say anything and only watched me as my own eyes skimmed her face.

Her eyes held something deep. I wasn’t sure if she knew her life was almost over or if she was thinking about all of the things in life she had yet to do. Or maybe she was thinking of Joey. I wonder if he was the love of her life. I had that once. It was something that was truly special. At the sight of the person, your heart rate increases, your arms fill with goosebumps as the small hairs on your arms stand up, and your thoughts come to a complete stop as you focus on only them; your body heats up as they move closer, one step at a time, and once their body touches yours you feel a sense of completeness.

You only get it once in your life.

Or maybe you get it multiple times.

I still wasn’t sure.

Love. It’s a strange thing. It comes out of nowhere, hitting you so hard that it takes the breath out of you. Love grasps your heart and refuses to let go. It tangles its fingers into your heart and doesn’t ever release until you accept it and let it stay apart of you. The special thing about love is that it can be deadly.

Hatred. Now, hatred is a funny thing. It consumes your whole body and masks you with nothing but the sight of red fury. Hatred goes a long way as it fills your body with a speed faster than lightning. Your body doesn’t get the choice to stop that pinch of anger once it’s been started, once the fire’s been lit. Soon you’ll find yourself with enough anger to kill.

Death. Death was an interesting thing. It’s just like love and makes you succumb to its every demand. Death takes your heart and crushes it. Leaving nothing but ashes and dust. As love, it takes you in, but as death, it forces you to leave. You can never recover from that darkness and you can never get that part of your heart back. Suddenly you’ll find yourself laying there in hell and next, you’ll find yourself never returning.

Ah, now let’s mix them together. Love can turn into hatred once the heart has been broken and ripped out of your chest. It causes a pain that can’t be fixed right away. That hatred leads you to do things that you shouldn’t. It leads you to become a monster at times. Why? I wasn’t sure, but part of me was sure it had to do with the fact that the love is still there. The love in your heart never actually leaves, and you hate yourself for that. This is why we do those stupid things. This is why we hurt the ones we love the most, not physically of course, no, emotionally. We can’t control the path our heart creates with our brain. We can’t stop the unexpected love. Just like we can’t stop death.

Blood. That was something I always found quite compelling. It releases from your body just by a simple scratch. Your body had plenty of the stuff, and if you lose some it doesn’t take much to regenerate it. But for some, blood was disgusting. They would throw up or pass out because they can’t handle the thought of the liquid leaking out of someone’s body drip by drip, pint by pint, quart by quart. Some were in love with the liquid. They would lick their wounds and others would donate it often because they truly enjoyed the feeling it gave them as it left their bodies. It was like a high.

Now, I didn’t ever have a problem with blood. I wasn’t the type to throw up or pass out, and I wasn’t the type to lick it either. I mean that’s just disgusting. But I didn’t ever mind donating blood every so often either because it was for a good cause, yet here I sit. Blood dripping onto the concrete one drop by one. The red liquid was drowning me. I was sitting in a pool of it and barely staying afloat as it continued to try to pull me under. It was on my lips, my cheeks, my nose, my forehead, my hands, my arms, and my clothes. It just kept appearing.

Every time I see blood I always think of him – him being the man that Jesse blew to fucking pieces all to prove a point. Jack Carson, he was the reason I ever took this job again. I was supposed to bring this agency down piece by piece, so he could have an out. Everyone knows the only way to leave a gang is by death. Therefore, that was our only option, but when Riley came in I knew that we actually had a chance. I was grateful, until Jesse did that thing none of expected. When he decided to blow up his own club. $even was around for years, so imagine all of our surprises when a bomb was placed in there and blew up 126 men, one of those men being Jack.

He was a great asset for the gang. He spiked drinks. He got Jesse’s targets exactly how he needed them, yet the heartless man still didn’t care. He still killed them all and made everything I did pointless. I suddenly didn’t find a reason to continue on. I couldn’t remember the reason to take down the gang as I smoked and drank until I couldn’t even remember my name. It was a strange feeling, a feeling that I’ll never go back to. Now, I remember my purpose – I remember that Jesse is a murderer and deserves to rot in hell.

A cough interrupted my thoughts, making me focus on the woman halfway in my lap. “Shh, you’re going to be okay,” I whispered, holding her body in my arms closer. “Just close your eyes,” I said, tucking her blonde hair behind her ear. “It will all be over soon.”

“I’m scared,” she whispered, her eyes never leaving mine as her body shook. I was surprised by the confession but didn’t show it as I lightly moved a piece of her hair away from her face.

“Don’t be. It was inevitable,” I said just as softly.

“This was bigger than all of us,” she said coughing, blood sputtering all over my face. I didn’t move to wipe it and only continued to stare down at her as I held her in my arms. “No one is strong enough to take on a case like this.”

I didn’t reply as I felt the tears surfacing. She didn’t know how true her words really were.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Once you start you won’t be able to stop.

My heart clenched at my inner thoughts. It was true: if I started to cry I wouldn’t stop. I didn’t even cry when Jack died.

Fuck, I seriously need a drink

“I’m so cold,” she mumbled.

I only held her body tighter against me to supply her some warmth.

“I know. Just close your eyes,” I told her once more. I bit my lip to keep a sob from escaping. How could this be happening? We did everything we were supposed to. I was silently taking downside missions while she and Claire were distracting Jesse with other things.

“I feel like I’m leaving things incomplete,” she said, opening her eyes again.

“You are a hero. Your name will go around the world and hear what you did. I promise you,” I responded shakily. She would be an agent that would go down in the books. Bringing a gang down wasn’t a big thing anymore, but Jesse’s gang was a different story. His gang is as deep as one can possibly go. They’re all psychopaths and they all are serial killers.

“I need you to tell him something for me,” the blonde said, squeezing my bloody hands with hers. I immediately knew she was referring to Joey.

“Anything.”

“Just t–tell him that I’m s–sorry,” she stuttered as she coughed up more blood. “No, tell him I love him.”

“Of course,” I promised.

In response, a small, sad smile appeared on her face. She closed her eyes again and part of me feared that this was the last time I was going to see those eyes. Her breathing got even slower, and I knew that this was it. It was happening. How is it that we were all healthy and alive even a few months ago. We were all too serious for our own good over these past months, and although we started as strangers we were ending as best friends. Leaving as best friends. Dying as best friends.

No, she and I weren’t ending as best friends. Her, Clover, and Claire were. Riley and I would be ending as partners.

I needed a cigarette.

I needed my head clear. Old thoughts and old memories were resurfacing and I wasn’t sure I could deal with them. The part that sucks is that I thought I could move on, that is until I realized Clover Thompson was using me as a ploy.

Going undercover is stupid as fuck.

I took a pack of Marlboro lights out of my coat pocket and lit up a stick of poison with my lighter. The feeling of the white stick in between my lips already started to relieve my need and take away the anxiety that was constantly clawing at my chest.

The smell of a cigarette is an interesting thing. As it’s lit, you watch as the end turns into a red ember. You bring the white stick to your lips and inhale the poison. The white smoke leaves your lips shortly after, before a new wave eventually returns once again as the white stick of addiction is brought back. Every time you inhale the poison your lungs die a little each time. It’s saddening really.

“She’s dying,” Clover’s voice whispered, interrupting my thoughts. She now stood next to me looking down at the figure in my lap.

“Yes,” I said just as softly, running my hands through Riley’s hair.

“How are we going to tell Joey?” she asked, kneeling down next to me.

“I don’t know, but he won’t forgive us. Liam won’t either,” I said gently as I exhaled a large amount of smoke.

“We need to get out of here,” she told me, but I couldn’t get myself to move.

“We’re not leaving her here! She deserves better than this,” I snapped, feeling my blood start to boil. She just wanted to leave her to either die or be finished off with a bullet in the head when someone else finds her in her dying state.

“We’ll come back for her. Take her ring. He’s going to want proof. I can’t see him believing us without it,” she told me.

I shakily moved my bloody hand to clutch hers. I slid the beautiful diamond ring off her finger and clutched it into my right hand. I can’t lose this.

“I’m so sorry,” I whispered in her ear as I lightly set her body down on the concrete and then wiped off tears on my face. Now wasn’t the time to mourn. Now was not the time to think about Jack either.

“Listen, she became one of my good friends. I love her too; remember, you’re doing the right thing.”

“She’s not completely dead yet. By leaving her here we are killing her,” I snapped. She still had a pulse, she was still alive, so why was she so ready to just leave her here to die.

“Since when have you had a problem with killing?” Clover said, rolling her eyes. “I mean this is partly your fault. You joined this all by yourself.”

I felt my fists clench knowing she was right.

No, she was only partly right. I joined this gang so I could cause its destruction from the inside.

I shook my head, ready to make a retort, but she cut in again. “You see, it’s funny how you try so hard to make yourself seem like a savior right now, yet here you are. Blood coating every inch of you; all the once-black clothes are now red. You’re a killer,” she snapped while pointing a finger at me.

“Jesse is a killer and he won’t stop until you all are dead!” I hissed back.

“Until we’re all dead,” Sse repeated as she nodded her head slowly, tears slowly welling up in her eyes. “I don’t know if you’ve realized it, but he has that mission about halfway completed.”

“Wait, she’s not the first one of you three to die?” I asked, looking down at the elegant ring in my hand. How can Jesse actually be succeeding?

She shook her head.

“No one is officially dead, but this is the second one that’s just on the brink, and I don’t mean out of the three of us. I mean I called the cops and after some convincing, they informed me that they are already on their way, but I heard them in the back talking. They got a call that a blonde got shot,” Clover informed me.

I felt my breath hitch in my throat.

“There are three well-known blondes here. Well, technically two since Riley’s really a brunette I think,” she said with a thoughtful look on her face.

“I didn’t mean for this all to happen,” I said, shaking my head. We were supposed to go from the vents straight through here and out through the crawl space. It was a simple plan.

“I need to see her. I owe her, and if she does die I don’t know what I’ll do,” I said, shaking my head.

Clover looked around the room.

“We don’t have time for this. If we want to get out of here alive, then we need to get going.”

Her phone rang throughout the room.

“Hello?” she said into the phone, wiping her forehead with her other hand, causing more blood to smear all over it. “Yeah, I’m on my way,” she said, glancing down at her hands.

“Listen, we should really talk about this in person. I’ll hopefully see you in a few.”

Clover looked back at me and acknowledged my presence again.

“Keith, Are you coming? I don’t have all day.”

“Who’s on the phone?” I asked, slipping the cigarette in between my lips and lightly setting Riley’s head on the concrete. I slipped off my jacket and laid her head on it for some support.

I looked down at the engagement ring still in the palm of my bloodied hand. She didn’t even get a chance to get married.

“Liam. He said that he’ll meet us with the others at a door in the computer wing in five minutes, so we just need to make it there. I’m guessing you know where that is,” Clover said.

I slowly took the cigarette out of my mouth and stepped on what was left of the stick.

“Fine, but we’re not leaving here without her. I don’t give a fuck if I’m carrying her the whole way there. We’re not leaving someone who worked her fucking ass off to keep you completely breathing and alive here to die. So if you want to run off now, then go ahead, but I’ll take as much time as needed to bring her out of this place,” I snapped. Clover stared at me with wide ideas, her mouth opening and closing a few times, unsure of what to say.

“Okay then. Get her up and let’s go,” she said, and I did exactly that. I slipped the ring back onto Riley’s finger before lifting her up.

If she’s going to die, it sure as hell won’t be in here.

Claire’s Point of View

I ran over to the room where I saw a familiar face trying to look through the small window. My heart felt relieved when I saw Caiden’s hazel eyes lock with my blues. His eyes turned from stone to immediate relief as well.

“Got a bobby pin?” Liam asked.

I nodded, reaching up to my hair. When the usual pin wasn’t there, I felt myself freeze. I already gave it up.

“No, Riley used it earlier,” I said, trying to move the locked handle.

“We would need something stronger anyways,” he said, digging through his pocket. He pulled out a pen and unscrewed it. I was slightly surprised to see it was a small drill. He worked quickly to undo the small screws in the door handle. My eyes caught sight of a man moving around the corner looking slightly panicked.

“Liam,” I whispered, nudging him slightly as the man with the gun walked down the hall towards us, the smirk on his face clearly showing that he knew we’re here.

“Hold on, I almost got it,” he said, focusing on the door handle. The man paused two feet away and held up his gun, pointing it towards me.

“You’re dead,” he mouthed, making me bite the inside of my cheek.

Okay, you’ve seen that one move a hundred times on TV. Do it.

Stupid things on TV never work.

It’s either you man up and grow a pair or I’ll personally see to it that you really don’t make it out of here alive.

But—

Fuck, just do it.

I swung my leg up in the air and hit his wrist, expecting the gun to go flying out of his hand.

Snap.

The man let out a yell and clutched onto his wrist.

Did I break his wrist?

Hell yeah. Finally, you did something right.

I mentally scowled at my conscious all the while staring wide-eyed at the man. Liam finally noticed the man and handed me the drill. He ran over, sending an immediate punch to the man’s face who quickly dodged it and sent a punch with his good hand. The unexpected punch caught Liam off guard as the impact making him stumble into the wall.

Liam quickly recovered and slammed his boot into the man’s chest before jumping up and slamming it into the man’s head. The guy’s nose had to be broken as it poured out blood, yet the guy still moved to send a kick to Liam’s leg. Liam stumbled back but regained himself immediately as he brought his fist straight into the man’s groin. He then brought his knee up and hit the man in the face three times. I watched in amazement as the man fell back, his eyes rolling to the back of his head.

“Damn,” I muttered, handing him the drill back. He didn’t respond and only continued until the door knob came off. Caiden didn’t hesitate to rush over to me. His lips slammed against mine and I pressed back with the same amount of force. My body was slammed against the wall roughly. His hands slid down the sides of my body, and I brought my hands to the back of his neck. A sharp pain came into my arm, reminding me of my wound. Caiden pulled away, looking down at my wound.

“Baby doll,” he whispered, not pulling his eyes away from the blood. He pulled back, his hands clenching into fists. He closed his eyes tightly and pressed his clenched hands to his forehead. It took thirty seconds before he slammed his fist into the wall repeatedly.

“Caiden,” I said, grabbing his shoulder. “Caiden, stop!” I yelled, pulling harder. He took a deep breath and stopped.

“Listen, as much as I’d love to watch your dramatics, we need to go,” Liam said, looking down at his phone.

“Well, that’s going to be hard because we have company,” Andrew said, causing us to look at the few men heading our way. When they noticed we saw them, they started shooting. Bullets started flying towards us causing Caiden to quickly pull me behind into the nearby hallway, shielding my body the whole way. Once we were in the clear, I checked his body for injuries.

“Are you okay?” I asked, placing my hand lightly on his chest and looking at him carefully.

“I’m fine,” he said, shrugging me off. He looked over the corner to the hallway, obviously hearing the guns stop.

“Is everyone okay?” I yelled.

“Yeah, we’re fine. They’re taken care of,” Joey said, looking over at our heads peeking around the corner. I didn’t want to be the one to run from danger, but when you have two specially trained agents with you it’s better to not get in their way and get shot once again.

“Andrew, c’mon we gotta go,” Joey said, ushering him out of the room he was hiding in. Andrew walked out and followed behind him. We let Joey take the lead, bringing us to whatever meeting point was set. I couldn’t help but wonder if I should tell Joey about what happened.

“It hurts like a bitch, huh?” Caiden whispered in my ear from beside me.

“What?” I asked looking up at him curiously, unsure of what he was talking about.

“Your arm?”

“Oh, yeah. I kind of forget about the pain when I’m distracted, but every time I move it I feel like someone’s twisting a knife into my arm,” I told him honestly. All I wanted to do was lay down in the safety of our bed and never move.

“You’re still wearing your ring?” he asked, sounding surprised. My eyebrows furrowed as I looked up at him.

“Of course. Why would I take it off?” I asked, ignoring the silence from the others, which clearly showed they were listening to our conversation.

Caiden noticed as well and talked in an even quieter voice. “Because I got you all involved in this shit,” he said, sounding angry with himself.

I stopped and placed my hand on his arm, stopping him from moving as well. “Hey, I got into all of this myself. I met Jesse by myself and made the stupid decision to become friends with him. Plus, I signed that contract that really had me in all of this,” I said, but he didn’t seem convinced. I moved my hands to his cheeks and pressed my lips against his. I didn’t give him time to respond as I quickly pulled away.

“I love you, okay?” I said seriously as I looked directly into his eyes and nowhere else.

“I love you,” he said back, placing his hands over mine before letting go. Realizing the group was already at the end of the hallway, we jogged down there and caught up with them.

“Glad to see you two love birds remembered that we aren’t in fantasy land right now,” Liam snapped, quickly noticing our presence again.

“Shut the fuck up,” Caiden snapped back in the same tone.

“Guys, guys. Let’s all take a chill pill and just worry about getting out of here,” Andrew suggested, placing his arms over both of their shoulders.

“Remove your arm before I break the fucking thing in half.”

I’m sure it wouldn’t be hard to guess who said that.

Who else uses the word ‘fuck’ in every sentence.

“I agree. We need to focus on the mission,” Joey said glancing at all of us before stopping at a door. He tested the door knob and it easily opened. He flicked on the lights, and the sight froze him.

“Riley,” he said, his voice almost cracking at the sight of his fiancé.

“She was shot twice,” Keith said.

Joey let out an inhuman noise.

“You son of a—”

Joey attacked Keith and slammed his fist into his face. I winced at the impact.

“He’s good. He helped us out. He saved them,” Liam tried to explain, pulling Joey back.

“A little help here please,” Liam muttered.

Andrew grabbed Joey’s other arm and pulled him back.

“He’s not lying. We wouldn’t have gotten this far without him, and Riley would already be dead without him, so stop acting stupid and go spend your last few minutes you have with her before she’s dead,” I snapped, causing him to pause. He stopped fighting and that’s when I realized he was crying.

I felt my heart break at the sight.

“I–I should have been here,” he whispered, pulling her into his lap. He moved his hand through her hair multiple times before pressing his lips on her forehead.

“I’m sorry, Riles. I’m so sorry,” he whispered as he brushed a stray strand from her face, showing the shakiness of his hands. “I love you. P–please don’t leave me, Riles. Please.”

Shattered.

That’s what my heart did because of his words. It completely shattered.