Contents · 31 sections
- HOW CANDIDE WAS BROUGHT UP IN A MAGNIFICENT CASTLE, AND HOW HE WAS EXPELLED THENCE.4 min
- II — WHAT BECAME OF CANDIDE AMONG THE BULGARIANS.4 min
- III — HOW CANDIDE MADE HIS ESCAPE FROM THE BULGARIANS, AND WHAT AFTERWARDS BECAME OF HIM.4 min
- IV — HOW CANDIDE FOUND HIS OLD MASTER PANGLOSS, AND WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM.5 min
- V — TEMPEST, SHIPWRECK, EARTHQUAKE, AND WHAT BECAME OF DOCTOR PANGLOSS, CANDIDE, AND JAMES THE ANABAPTIST.4 min
- VI — HOW THE PORTUGUESE MADE A BEAUTIFUL AUTO-DA-FÉ, TO PREVENT ANY FURTHER EARTHQUAKES; AND HOW CANDIDE WAS PUBLICLY WHIPPED.2 min
- VII — HOW THE OLD WOMAN TOOK CARE OF CANDIDE, AND HOW HE FOUND THE OBJECT HE LOVED.4 min
- VIII — THE HISTORY OF CUNEGONDE.5 min
- IX — WHAT BECAME OF CUNEGONDE, CANDIDE, THE GRAND INQUISITOR, AND THE JEW.3 min
- X — IN WHAT DISTRESS CANDIDE, CUNEGONDE, AND THE OLD WOMAN ARRIVED AT CADIZ; AND OF THEIR EMBARKATION.3 min
- XI — HISTORY OF THE OLD WOMAN.6 min
- XII — THE ADVENTURES OF THE OLD WOMAN CONTINUED.6 min
- XIII — HOW CANDIDE WAS FORCED AWAY FROM HIS FAIR CUNEGONDE AND THE OLD WOMAN.4 min
- XIV — HOW CANDIDE AND CACAMBO WERE RECEIVED BY THE JESUITS OF PARAGUAY.6 min
- XV — HOW CANDIDE KILLED THE BROTHER OF HIS DEAR CUNEGONDE.4 min
- XVI — ADVENTURES OF THE TWO TRAVELLERS, WITH TWO GIRLS, TWO MONKEYS, AND THE SAVAGES CALLED OREILLONS.6 min
- XVII — ARRIVAL OF CANDIDE AND HIS VALET AT EL DORADO, AND WHAT THEY SAW THERE.6 min
- XVIII — WHAT THEY SAW IN THE COUNTRY OF EL DORADO.9 min
- XIX — WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM AT SURINAM AND HOW CANDIDE GOT ACQUAINTED WITH MARTIN.8 min
- XX — WHAT HAPPENED AT SEA TO CANDIDE AND MARTIN.4 min
- XXI — CANDIDE AND MARTIN, REASONING, DRAW NEAR THE COAST OF FRANCE.3 min
- XXII — WHAT HAPPENED IN FRANCE TO CANDIDE AND MARTIN.16 min
- XXIII — CANDIDE AND MARTIN TOUCHED UPON THE COAST OF ENGLAND, AND WHAT THEY SAW THERE.2 min
- XXIV — OF PAQUETTE AND FRIAR GIROFLÉE.8 min
- XXV — THE VISIT TO LORD POCOCURANTE, A NOBLE VENETIAN.9 min
- XXVI — OF A SUPPER WHICH CANDIDE AND MARTIN TOOK WITH SIX STRANGERS, AND WHO THEY WERE. [34]6 min
- XXVII — CANDIDE'S VOYAGE TO CONSTANTINOPLE.6 min
- XXVIII — WHAT HAPPENED TO CANDIDE, CUNEGONDE, PANGLOSS, MARTIN, ETC.5 min
- XXIX — HOW CANDIDE FOUND CUNEGONDE AND THE OLD WOMAN AGAIN.2 min
- XXX — THE CONCLUSION.8 min
- FOOTNOTES:7 min
Candide · Voltaire
XXIII — CANDIDE AND MARTIN TOUCHED UPON THE COAST OF ENGLAND, AND WHAT THEY SAW THERE.
Read online · About 2 minutes"Ah, Pangloss! Pangloss! Ah, Martin! Martin! Ah, my dear Cunegonde, what sort of a world is this?" said Candide on board the Dutch ship.
"Something very foolish and abominable," said Martin.
"You know England? Are they as foolish there as in France?"
"It is another kind of folly," said Martin. "You know that these two nations are at war for a few acres of snow in Canada,[31] and that they spend over this beautiful war much more than Canada is worth. To tell you exactly, whether there are more people fit to send to a madhouse in one country than the other, is what my imperfect intelligence will not permit. I only know in general that the people we are going to see are very atrabilious."
Talking thus they arrived at Portsmouth. The coast was lined with crowds of people, whose eyes were fixed on a fine man kneeling, with his eyes bandaged, on board one of the men of war in the harbour. Four soldiers stood opposite to this man; each of them fired three balls at his head, with all the calmness in the world; and the whole assembly went away very well satisfied.
"What is all this?" said Candide; "and what demon is it that exercises his empire in this country?"
He then asked who was that fine man who had been killed with so much ceremony. They answered, he was an Admiral.[32]
"And why kill this Admiral?"
"It is because he did not kill a sufficient number of men himself. He gave battle to a French Admiral; and it has been proved that he was not near enough to him."
"But," replied Candide, "the French Admiral was as far from the English Admiral."
"There is no doubt of it; but in this country it is found good, from time to time, to kill one Admiral to encourage the others."
Candide was so shocked and bewildered by what he saw and heard, that he would not set foot on shore, and he made a bargain with the Dutch skipper (were he even to rob him like the Surinam captain) to conduct him without delay to Venice.
The skipper was ready in two days. They coasted France; they passed in sight of Lisbon, and Candide trembled. They passed through the Straits, and entered the Mediterranean. At last they landed at Venice.
"God be praised!" said Candide, embracing Martin. "It is here that I shall see again my beautiful Cunegonde. I trust Cacambo as myself. All is well, all will be well, all goes as well as possible."